*With gratitude to all who contributed to this crowd-sourced list poem following my social media inquiry

I’m so sorry that happened to you.
It makes sense you would feel that way.

I believe you.

I want you to notice your own wise instincts.
Follow your instincts. Don’t ignore red flag behaviors.

You dictate your own independence and safety.

You deserved grace.

That was tricky, and you handled that well.

Trust your own knowledge. Trust the skills
you have accumulated over a lifetime of learning.
Trust your ability to keep learning more.

Glad you are listening to your gut.
It is an important thought partner.

What you know to be true, is true.
What you saw, what you felt, how you feel now.
It’s all real. I believe you.

It happened. That must have been agony.
I’m here to support you and the truth.

Thank you for trusting me. What do you need?

Gosh, you’re right. I did behave in that way, and I can see how it was hurtful.

I apologize, and I will work to make sure it doesn’t happen again.

I’m a dumbass. You’re right. I feel uncomfortable.
But I can also imagine how much more uncomfortable this must feel for you to point things out to my dumbass.

You are 100% right. I am so sorry.
I believe you. I support you.

Your answer was clear and well-reasoned.
You were right. That makes sense.

Want me to stab them for you?

I see all that you’re becoming.
You deserve better.

You’re not lazy or undisciplined.
You just needed rest.

I am holding space for you when you are ready.

There is such a thing as bad faith. We would all do well to learn to recognize it and walk away.

It’s not your fault.
You were spot on.

It wasn’t your fault.
What you said, was spot on.

Sunu P. Chandy (she/her) is a social justice activist including through her work as a poet and a civil rights attorney. She is the daughter of immigrants from Kerala, India, and currently lives in DC with her family. Her award-winning collection of poems, My Dear Comrades, was published by Regal House, and she is a Pushcart Prize nominated poet. Sunu is currently a Senior Advisor with Democracy Forward, and on the board of the Transgender Law Center. Sunu has been included as one of the Washington Blade’s Queer Women of Washington.

Featured image “File:Lake Tekapo 01.jpg” Uploaded by Krzysztof Golik to be licensed via creative commons 2.0 via Wikimedia Commons.