Epilogue by Neelam Patel

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I hate you with the sharpness of the edges of a Viking’s teeth

I hate you from every part of my body – from my ankles, my knees and my throat

I hate you from the feet of all my ancestors

and from my heartbeat from when I was an ocean fish

You are a force who brings innocent branches down with a crash

Under the guise of kindness and support

You came to me

dressed up like a kind old lady

begging for an apple

I gave you my orchard

You said you loved to coach

But for you Losing was an all the time thing

You paid this poet with your darkest habits

You coach your arm in fistfights with the angels

Your other arm, good, stays defeated

Locked up in your stupid cage

Throw your fist, punch the sky

kill the birds and watch me fly

From the concrete mess you make,

I take the rubble, the hate

A bulk so heavy I have flung it at every other guy,

hurting my own back.

You made me your heart’s punching bag

I’m haunted – flinching from your ghost attacks

Exhausted

I have wrung out all the sweat from all the clothes I’ve suffered in

Since your last emotional blow years ago

You left me exhausted in a field of your own personal battles –

And now I remain victorious in my knowledge

I didn’t ever do anything wrong

I’m just a poet who needs to sing her song

while you remain back there slinging back drinks

in that bar, you know the one, where on sunny days,

pigs are brought to roast

 

Yellow 2008

Neelam Patel is an Arlington, VA based writer, actress, and dancer.  She’s had the opportunity to perform as a featured poet at IOTA and Barnes and Noble.  She feels fortunate to have acting credits including her solo show, Sari to Skin, and as lead in a traveling production called Interior Castle.  She’s currently finding public places around the world to stage short solo dance pieces.  Day job is in IT Security field.

Image: By Kris*M [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons Author photo: Courtesy of the author.

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