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Always There by Jennifer Daschel

This poem is published as part of the Amplifying Disabled Voices special section, selected by editors Christopher Heuer, Marlena Chertock, and Gregory Luce.
 

Always There

Been so long it is hard to remember
   surely it couldn’t have been that bad
A single twinge reminds me, it’s always there, lurking,
   scaring me,
Is it happening again…

   Don’t touch me, it hurts.
   Why does it hurt with just the slightest breeze?
   Why do the doctors not believe me
   Fire shooting straight down my arm,
      Color changes, always cold, NO…

No, not this time
   breathe deep, it’s fine for now
Every time it’s the same
   the fear is always there.
Remission never feels like forever
   hopefully it will be long enough.
 

Jennifer Daschel was diagnosed with CRPS, RSD as a teenager – currently in remission. In addition, she has lupus and gastroparesis. Her daughter, now 17, became disabled at 14 from a progressive neuromuscular disorder and a brain injury. As her full-time caregiver, she continues to learn about ableism and inclusion. She and her daughter continue to advocate for disability access.

Featured image in this post is, “Life is a fractal explosion” By Joselodos – licensed creative commons via Wikimedia Commons.




Two Poems By Kathryn Schug

These poems are published as part of the Amplifying Disabled Voices special section, selected by editors Christopher Heuer, Marlena Chertock, and Gregory Luce.
 

32

32 Units left
Never out of my mind
Humalog* but not humorous

Always on my mind
The tubing snaking up my back
A constant reminder, a slither
A whisper

Did you bolus?
Did you actually count?
Did you do it right?

You’re falling
                   Falling
                            Falling
Oh no, you’re shaking
Oops, you over did it!
What a shame,
Now you’re rising
                            Rising

                                                    Rising

                                                                and yet

                                                                           still Failing.

                                                                                    Failing
                                                                                            Failing
                                                                                                    Failing
                                                                                                            Failing

                                                                                                                Fail

* An artificial type of insulin used to treat type 1 diabetes. 32 references the remaining units in
an insulin pump.

Dis*a *bled
 
dis*a *bled \ adj. 1. A “differently abled” person/A label created by “able” bodied people, / So as not to distinguish the disabled/ No dishonor/ Yet they disengage the community/ One word doesn’t provide justice. /It doesn’t even begin to describe the experience/ The, “my grandma has that”/ The, “I know everything about you”/ A label not of their own but of someone else’s ideals./Distinguished/Dishonored/Disengaged. 2. Some pain visible, others just plague the mind. / Silent suffering no one knows about/ The thoughts it takes to get out of bed/ Never enough. / The cycle of shame never ends/ The, “I have that”/ The, “I understand” / Reds, purples, yellows, and blues collide/Flesh barely staying alive/Fighting a body that tries to kill. / Always on that daily grind, / Constantly sleep deprived, /To survive. /Bled/Blood/Blame.
 

Kathryn Schug is an aspiring writer and book arts artist. In 2023, her poem, “Voices of All” won the Dexter R. Stanton MLK Art & Essay Contest College Award. Also in 2023, she won the Undergraduate Prize in German Studies in English from The Ohio State University, the first student from the College of Saint Benedict and Saint John’s University (CSB+SJU) to win. Her altered book, My Book House: Unlocking Personal Lives, was featured and given an honorable mention in the 2023 All Student Juried Exhibit. In 2024, Schug was the curator of the exhibit, Duality: Artists’ Books Exploring Multiple Sides. Recently, Schug co-authored a peer-reviewed article with Dr. Ted Gordon, “Rights of Nature: The Indigenous-Led Movement for Sovereignty and a Sustainable Future” published in The Journal of Social Encounters. Schug has lived with Type 1 Diabetes since 2009, a condition that has impacted every aspect of her life.

Featured image in this post is, “I hooked up my new insulin pump. Not quite bionic, but it augments my body” By cogdogblog, licensed creative commons via Wikimedia Commons.





Two Poems By Barbara Maria

These poems are published as part of the Amplifying Disabled Voices special section, selected by editors Christopher Heuer, Marlena Chertock, and Gregory Luce.
 

Even the Trees Tell Me That My Body is Not an Apology *

As the buds of the tulip tree emerge from the depths to color a life,

the pignut hickory’s leaf scars are shaped like a heart — the divots a discontinuation of the smooth bark to give a gift back to the soil

the rings around each twig, each branchlet
knobby and lumpy and to some an interruption

but let us celebrate these as continuations
the scars and marks and bumps and goop
and juice and blood and salt and pulp and pith

proof of our beautiful continuation
our hike through the forest of deaths that make a life
the beating thumping dancing heart that
shapes our woven leaf scars and wooden branchlet rings

so that our tulip trees may never stop blooming.

*Title inspired by Sonya Renee Taylor’s poem, The Body Is Not an Apology
 

Florida

the last time you undressed me,
I was golden
naive skin
hungry blue eyes
the world was my friend, and you, my lover

did I feel smooth? no velcro or adhesive or plastic.
a manatee that hadn’t yet been mangled by a fishing boat
an oyster who still held her pearl
didn’t know she would lose her pearl
didn’t hold on hard enough to guard her pearl

wrapped/rapt
in my own arms i feel my body come apart
i slurp my very own organ soup
filled with herbs and pills and all the different goops:
mri goop,
ultrasound goop,
physical therapy goop,
gloved goop,
eye goop

what would your fingers find inside of me now?
a pessary,
an organ –
or two

have i lost my luster i would ask?
have i turned green as jade?
dull with throbbing heaviness?
do you also hear the cigna hold song or is that just in my head?

can you embrace me and put me back together without tapes or splints or drugs and
promise promise promise that

you will pull yourself out of me and
marvel at what you see: your
fingers slick with my very own golden nectar goop

Barbara Maria (she/her) grew up along the Pacific Coast and now resides beside the Potomac River. Find her conversing with the moon, talking to trees, and playing by the water. Barbara is a part of the EDS community and explores the intersections between ecology, queerness, and disability through her writing and herbalism practices.

Featured image in this post is, “Inside the Forest – painting by László Mednyánszky” By László Mednyánszky, licensed creative commons via Wikimedia Commons.

Two Poems By Juliana Schifferes

These poems are published as part of the Amplifying Disabled Voices special section, selected by editors Christopher Heuer, Marlena Chertock, and Gregory Luce.
 

The Genuine Article

What keeps me around?
You know me
even the snarls and tangles
you don’t
want to feel
but can’t comb out of me

Unlike some childhood totem
something like a grown woman
even with my unalterable aversions
towards vacuums
acrylic sweaters
networking
Non-monogamy

something like a real woman
spiked with fears
heavy as gasoline
in a Molotov cocktail
but that’s not what makes
me real to you

like an adrenaline rush
you’ve unlocked something
stumbled into
a penchant for elation
that only you knew was hiding
 

Ghrelin

reward the breath for it is fleeting
reward the lip and its hunger
the body’s diplomats
the body is an absurdity
that demands tribute
breath, hunger and thirst
mafia consigliere

Juliana “Jules” Schifferes is a poet from the Washington, DC area. She was the winner of the inaugural Luce Prize, awarded by Day Eight to an early-career poet of promise. She has published in The Mid-Atlantic Review (formerly Bourgeon), Wishbone Words, Poetry X Hunger and Washington Writers’ Publishing House. She works at a civil society organization, fighting the good fight, when she’s not writing. In her free time, you’ll find her curled up with poetry and a cat. She identifies as autistic.

Featured image in this post is, “Training bijstandseenheid 12” By Ministerie van Defensie, licensed creative commons via Wikimedia Commons.

Two poems by Rima Shaffer

0

These poems are published connected to a series of workshops produced in partnership between Day Eight and the East Rock Creek Senior Village supported by a Creative Spark grant from the DC Commission on the Arts and Humanities.
 

Short Age: a Double Whammy

I am short, getting shorter.
Meet the incredible shrinking woman.

Short is:
The top two shelves always bare-naked
Unused, undusted.

Short is:
Plotting my exit from a crowded subway-
Two stops in advance.

Short is:
A deviation from the norm.
A statistical a nom aly,
Mar gin al..  Change happens at the margins.

Short is:
Cutting three to six inches from slacks; even petite sizes.

Short is:
The urban version of the hiker, making noises to ward off bear.
Drivers, hurriers, scurries, day dreamers, bikers, scooters….

STOP! LOOK! LISTEN!
I am here. Don’t mow me down.

STOP! LOOK! LISTEN!
Short touches the earth. Grounded, rooted, earthy.
Beware of things underfoot! Be AWARE

Be aware of the unseen, the OVER-looked.
The Trojan horse sat; a harmless gift
With an army in its belly.

Short has its own kind of power:
Napoleon Bona-parte
Robert Reich
Cleo-pat- era
Donna Sha-la-la
Simone Biles
Joan of Arc
Harriet Tubman
Barbara Mi-kul-ski
Mother Teresa
Elena Kagan
Dr. Ruth
Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Short is
Being amused, yet tired of projections
Hey Shortie, cutie, sweetie pie
Isn’t she a dor a ble!
Look at that sweet old lady.
Pardon me while I puke.
Your platitudes
Don’t diminish or infantilize ME
Do you get more by making others less?
More space?
More air time?
More power?
Higher altitude?
Your attitude
Your aptitude
For platitude
Is simply rude
Who asked you anyway?

We all matter.
All have pieces to this puzzle.
Matter
To each other.
To the whole.
Each one of with unique gifts,
Talents,
Powers,

I am
Short: safe, non-threatening, welcoming
AUTHENTIC.
I creep up on you; win you over
I am stealth power
I matter.
I pack a wallop.
You pack a wallop.
Together we are dynamite.

 
Putting Food By

Butts bounce in the back of the pick-up.
We squeal with delight.
In the cab, my aunt drives like a woman, possessed.
Over rutted, dusty roads,
We return from the orchard,
Truck bed packed with
Kids and flats of fruit.

Then, Fae, Bea, and Ida, the kitchen coven,
Begin their magic.
The three sisters, fingers, tannin-stained,
Labor, kvetch, and coax
Skins and stubborn pits from fruit,

Sweetness and steam
Cling to my skin, tickle my senses,
And etch their place in my memory.

We begin the annual ritual, the sacred rite:
Putting food by,
Preparing for the long winter.

The sisters’ faces gleam.
Occasionally, one brushes a stray wisp of hair
From her brow.
The fruits, an amazing palette:
Globed golden apricots, skins intact.
Are ladled into quart jars.
Ruby red raspberries, plump,
Fecund with seed,
Are pureed into jam.
Orange skins coil and glisten,
Pith contrasting with peel,
On their way to becoming marmalade.
Apples transform, translucent, into
Textured sauce,
Amethyst plums glisten in sugary syrup.

All are placed in
The enormous enamel canner:
The spa, the hot water bath.
High steam produces the perfect
Vacuum seal.
I listen as they pop closed.

In the larder,
The crown jewels glisten
In their Mason jar settings.
Larger jars- sirens, temptresses
Filled with oatmeal raisin.
And peanut butter cookies
Beckon us to eat them.

Twice daily, cows welcome the
Coarse hands relieving their
Bursting udders.
Then milk cascades
Down the separator
Cream for cobblers and berries.

Symbiosis of land, labor, and love.
 

Rima Shaffer began a third chapter as she approached her eightieth decade. Vivid pictorial memories from childhood, her garden, and current life can be found in her essays, poetry and books. She enjoys the challenge of writing haikus that linger. She also creates images, using macro-photography, watercolors, fiber art, and mixed media. Her love of color, appreciation of metaphor and language, sense of rhythm, and wicked sense of humor can be found in all her work. Rima facilitates a group of senior visual artists for the East Rock Creek Village. In an earlier chapter of her life, she was an Artist-in-Residence at the Wesley Theological Center, ran the arts education program for the Potomac Craftsmen, and ran the summer arts day camp for the St, Patrick’s Episcopal Day School. As an organization developer, Rima wrote an internal blog on leadership and taught in the Johns Hopkins graduate Applied Behavioral Science Program.

Featured image this post is, “Napoloeon Crossing The Alps”, by Jacques-Louis David, 1800, Collection of the Musee national de Malmaison et Bois-Preau, public domain, via wikimedia commons